Welcome to One-derland!

I can officially say that I am no longer in the twos. After a weekend of eating really well and drinking copious amounts of water, the scale rewarded me this morning by showing 199.4!

For more than two years, although I'm not sure exactly when I tipped the scale, I have weighed more than 200 pounds. I let the weight creep on during and after college until I was no longer in one-derland, and in turn, no longer even content with my body.

It's been quite a long process since August, but I have finally reached my first true milestone of dropping below that 200 mark, and DAMN DOES IT FEEL GOOD!

As I've reminded other people all day today, I have a long way to go until I reach my ultimate goal, and even until I'm happy with the way I look, but I'm down more than 30 lbs now and that's a monstrous accomplishment in and of itself.

It sounds ridiculous, but after I got showered and dressed this morning I immediately sent a text to my sister, best friend and dad, and emailed my mom in order to share the news with the people who have been along the journey with me. It felt really good not only being proud of myself, but receiving such kind words from those around me and those who love me.

Tomorrow I may step on the scale and it may start with a 2, and that's ok, because I've jumped the hurdle. Every step of this journey has been about taking two steps forward and one step back because the body fluctuates, but the one thing I am absolutely positive of is that I can do it. I am doing it. Welcome to One-derland!

Excuses, Excuses

Yesterday Mike and I got an early start from our house to drive to Primm, Nevada to pick something up at the outlet mall that we couldn't find at the outlets in Las Vegas. Just like every morning, Mike needed coffee from Dunkin Donuts down the street and so we stopped through the drive-thru on the way out of town.

As we sat in the drive-thru waiting to order Mike's regular coffee with cream, sugar and a few ice cubes, I kept dreaming about a delicious donut or a grilled cheese flat bread. It was at that moment, the few seconds before placing our order, that I realized how many times a day I attempt to come up with "legitimate" excuses to eat something or indulge or go outside my diet.

I grew up hearing the phrase "excuses, excuses" over and over again when I would say something to legitimize not cleaning my room or not eating all of my vegetables or to get out of being in trouble for my latest shenanigans. It certainly didn't get me anywhere then, but over time I've allowed myself to indulge in those little excuses and basically get away with eating a donut when we stop at Dunkin Donuts or not go to the gym because I had a "long day."

Thinking about this yesterday really made me look at the bigger picture and how many times I either make excuses and accept them or attempt to make excuses every day. It's really ridiculous, but I do it all the time. Through this process (going on six months) of changing my eating patterns and losing weight I've gotten better at not buying into my little excuses and not rationalizing why I just have to stop for an Egg McMuffin from McDonalds for breakfast, but from time to time my incredible skills of wordplay and legitimate excuses get the better of me and I indulge. And what do you think is the aftermath of those little lapses? Regret, sorrow and sometimes even tears for allowing myself to get tied up in the excuses.

Now before you assume what happened, I didn't get anything at Dunkin Donuts yesterday morning and we actually didn't get fast food anywhere on our little adventure, but that didn't stop the scale from escalating more than a pound today. I know, I know, there are a lot of factors that come into play every single day before I step on the scale like water weight, simple bloating, the fact that I've felt ill for two days, etc., but I still hate seeing the numbers increase instead of decrease.

I'm almost there though, I'm almost in the one-hundreds and not two-hundreds, and I can't weight, no pun intended! I can't help but wonder though, is anyone else still trying to lose weight out there? Is anyone who has been with me since September still on their own journey? I hope you are, I hope we can keep pushing forward.

My Hurdles

As I went back and re-read a few of my blog postings, I realized that I have a few hurdles that I really need to work hard on to overcome in 2010. I've been stagnant in the 201-205 lb. range for almost two months and my first hurdle is to hit that 200 lb. mark and push past it. At this point I'm about ready to throw myself a party when I hit 200 lb. since it's been such a long time coming!

Last night I thought a lot about what other hurdles I have to jump over before I can continue on to the finish line, and I thought I'd share those. The hurdles, I think, are a bigger part of the process than eating right and exercising because they play more into the mental aspect of the journey and are less calculated than reminding myself to go to the gym or not eat chocolate whenever I want.
Here are five hurdles I'm working to overcome in 2010:

1. Eating my emotions: Although I've gotten better at not grabbing a bag of potato chips when I'm feeling blue, I know that I still have an overwhelming feeling to eat junk food or eat large quantities of food when my emotions are getting the better of me. This is my #1 hurdle to jump over this year. I want food to be less important than my well-being.

2. The gym takes all my time: For some reason I have it set in my mind that the gym=all my time. I dread going to the gym a lot of the time because I equate it with eating up a large portion of my day, when in reality I'm only there no more than a couple of hours.

3. "Cheat Days" are good: When I started this weight loss journey back in August, I told myself that I wouldn't have any "cheat days" during the week where I allowed myself more calories than normal. I've realized now those special days are not only okay for the diet if they are spaced out and a supplement to eating right, but they're actually beneficial to my diet and to my mind frame. Having a day to indulge in mashed potatoes eases my mind of being so stringent and worried about calories, AND I get to enjoy some of the foods that I love that I put aside due to my weight-loss goals.

4. Exercise does not always mean the gym: I always equate exercising with going to the gym and using the equipment. I haven't been the type of person to go on long walks or take a hike in Red Rock since early college when I was an avid rock climber, so with my goals to exercise more it's been all about going to the gym or watching exercise videos. So many people that I know go hiking or biking or play football in the park and burn calories that way. A real goal for me this year is to exercise more not only at the gym, but using out-of-the-box techniques as well.

5. Self-perception: Although it isn't listed as #1, possibly my biggest hurdle in 2010 and in life is the way I view myself. I've lost 30 lbs., I'm proud of what I see in the mirror, and yet I still don't view myself in a positive light. My biggest hurdle is self-criticism and low self-esteem. It's time to change that. Actually, changing my self-perception is WAY past due.

These are only a few of the hurdles I want to overcome in the next few months, but are only a handful of the hurdles I've come across on this journey. I have a long way to go before I'm happy with myself, but sometimes even I'm surprised by my progress and by the change in my everyday life. Eating is no longer the most important part of the day, but instead it supplements my actions and activities. I said it once and I'll say it again, I think 2010 is going to be a great year.

Feelin' Good

I think it's safe to say that 2009 is behind us and we are well in the thick of things for 2010. Yesterday I spent more than enough time organizing files and making sure the loose ends of 2009 are wrapped up and I'm prepared for what's to come in 2010. I've even found that even though I'm back to not snacking or enjoying a chocolatey treat whenever I want, I'm relieved to be eating healthier.

During the holiday season I enjoyed eating cookies and having a piece of chocolate that was delivered to the office, but I didn't feel well overall. My stomach seemed perpetually upset, I felt sluggish and tired all of the time. I forgot that along with eating well and exercising regularly comes an overall feeling of good health and being refreshed.

I'm only back in the game a couple of days right now, but my body feels better. I think it also has to do with the fact that I've instantly cut back on the amount of Diet Coke I'm drinking and I've been consuming water like we're about to run out forever, but whatever the reason, I can already feel the positive impact.

Here are five simple guidelines that I'm sticking to this New Year, in lieu of a "New Year's Resolution":

1. Always take the stairs.
2. Drink more water than anything else / always carry water with me.
3. Never deprive myself of sleep, if for some reason this happens, make time to catch up.
4. Go to the gym every week without fail (obviously a more regular goal is in place, but this is a generic guideline).
5. Never deprive myself of something sweet, just be sure to take it in moderation.

What are your little guidelines for 2010? Care to share, leave a comment here!